Whether you&rsquo,re fresh to the world of online dating or need a refresher on the best ways to enhance your profile, our experienced advice will help, says Lucy Vine
8:43AM BST 29 Aug
1. Your photos is everything
This is the big one, because depressing tho’ it may be, your smiling face is the very first thing on which people will judge you. Relationship psychologist Honey Langcaster-James says: “,Look straight into the camera and smile displaying your teeth –, this says open, friendly, healthy and confidence.”, A latest examine of the most popular profiles on dating sites displayed 88 vanaf cent are making eye voeling with the camera te their profile picture.
Jim Talbott, director of consumer insights at Match.com, also suggests: “,Keep your photos fresh, and exchange out your primary photo frequently. You look like a fresh user and people who might have missed you before are more likely to give you a 2nd look.”, A final thought from Honey: “,Don’t be tempted to airbrush your picture or present yourself looking too much better than you do ter actual life, and give group photos a miss to avoid confusion.”,
Two. Ask a friend to read your profile
It might feel a little awkward, but dating accomplished Peter Spalton says it’s a excellent idea to ask a friend to personages a fresh eye overheen what you’ve written –, and not just to check your spelling. “,Wij live ter a soundbite society so the very first 30 words of your profile truly count,”, says Peter. “,Attempt to avoid cliches te your profile because, let’s face it, everyone wants someone who’s loyal and wij all like walking on the beach at sunset. Ask your friend to keep an eye out for overused phrases.”,
Honey adds: “,It’s a good idea to emphasise your activities spil people tend to be attractive to those who convey health and vitality.”, It’s true –, two of the most commonly used words te profiles on OkCupid are yoga and (slightly more intimidatingly) surfing. But running, skiing, tennis, dancing and cycling were also rated very.
Trio. Don’t be Google-able
Just like meeting a stranger ter existente life, you have to stay safe when you’re online. Before providing away information such spil job titles or individual details, think very first about how those could be used to track you online.
“,Be careful what you say about yourself,”, says Honey. “,Could someone use those details to find you on LinkedIn, for example? It is also possible to search using your pic online, so use a photo that doesn’t emerge anywhere else on the internet if you value your privacy.”,
Denise Knowles from relate.com says a good guide is remembering that the same rules apply both on and offline. “,Let a friend know where you’ll be and when, and arrange a time to text to let them know you’re OK,”, she says.
Four. Yes, message very first
A loterijlot of the outdated dating rules don’t apply, and sending the very first message online is actively encouraged if you want to get your profile looked at. Peter Spalton says being proactive is key. “,Set aside an amount of time every day and write a handful of tailored introductory messages to fresh people,”, he says.
“,It’s always visible when someone is cutting and pasting the same genérico &#x,hi’ message. Keep it brief and avoid strong talk te those early messages. Wij all have emotional baggage and now is not the time or place.”,
Five. Use it on Sunday
Sunday is the best time to get online. Research shows that peak time for users on Tinder, OkCupid and Match are all on a Sunday afternoon, especially after 5pm. Most experts recommend dedicating at least 30 minutes every evening to the process. “,Set yourself a limit, but keep at it, it’ll be worth the effort,”, says Peter.
6. Keep your options open
It might feel strange, but, spil Honey says, don’t feel that you have to speak to one person at a time. “,This is online dating, so most people will be talking to a few people at merienda. Don’t take that personally, just be fair about it. Meeting to see if there is any chemistry should not be too big a overeenkomst. You’re not monogamous just because you’ve bot emailing each other for a duo of weeks.”,
Which is why, Peter adds, it’s worth meeting up spil quickly spil possible. “,Get to the very first date spil quickly spil possible –, you only need to exchange two or three messages before you suggest meeting –, you won’t know if there’s anything inbetween you until you’re face-to-face. After all this is about dating, not emailing.”,
7. Attempt not to get disheartened
Along the way, you’ll almost certainly meet some duds. You can have matching profiles, get on like a house on fire overheen email, and then have zero chemistry te actual life. But Honey says it’s significant to stick with it.
“,Online dating should be an pleasurable and joy practice. Don’t take it too gravely and prepare yourself to meet slew of nice, friendly people who you absolutely don’t fancy. At some stage, there will be someone that you do. Many people go on around 30 dates before they meet someone they truly fall for online. So attempt to keep that te perspective and love the process.”,